oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
