We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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