Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
