how can u be prego again
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize