i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
