Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
