Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize