we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Sorry my hands just texted you
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
