Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
