i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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