he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Randomize
