I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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