Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
