accomplished twins. life is a go
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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