I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
