He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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