I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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