There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
sex in a hospital.. check
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
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