do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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