I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
