I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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