Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
