I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
