I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
They have beer where we have blood.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
