i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
