Apparently you make a good broom.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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