I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
