you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
my being single is dangerous.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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