i used baking grease as lip gloss
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize