hotel room ftw
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm too high and old for this...
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
