Don't you send me to vm
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
