Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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