he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
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