Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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