I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
