We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize