SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
