sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
do herpes really smell.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
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