We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
