the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
