its not stalking. its research.
is wine microwaveable?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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