You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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