My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
