lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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