i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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