did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
