You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
and you said cock pushups were impossible
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
