Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
