Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
