dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
