i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize