I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize